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What is the Authentic Dating & Sexual Communication Course?


Authentic Dating & Sexual Communication is a 6-week virtual course that meets over Zoom.

The course is primarily experiential, although with a lot of stimulating content (delivered as lecture/presentations and open discussion), covering 4 major areas: Authentic Relating, Sexual Polarity, Dating Strategy and Sexual Communication. We will frequently break-out into same-sex rooms and/or small groups, and you will have an opportunity to go on practice dates with the other participants. The course will be particularly impactful for you if you are single and looking, or else poly and looking for more, and using online dating sites and apps; however it can also be very valuable for deepening an existing relationship, improving the quality of your sex life, healing sexual trauma and self-esteem issues, etc.

The course is designed for heterosexual, cis-gendered people, however these are universal skills and we welcome people of all sexual orientations and gender preferences, with the caveat that you will need to choose a gender preference and stick to it throughout the course, in order to create safety in the same-sex groups. There are a few other requirements as well, listed here.

Tickets are limited and can be purchased at the bottom of the Authentic Dating Circles page. You can preview some of the content on the Videos page.


Men: Here is what you can learn:

Confused by Women?

  • To combine your passion to excel in life, with your love and desire for women
  • To make a difference for women through empathic listening and sharing yourself vulnerably (Hint: they CRAVE this from us)
  • Understand why women seem so fearful, defensive, angry and shut-down — and what you can do about it
  • To reframe negative experiences you may have had with women and dating, experiences which may have left you even more jaded, hurt, lonely and horny than before
  • Learn the foundations of female sexual attraction in order to attract a quality woman — without playing any games

Men: this is WAY beyond “Pick-Up Artist” — you will learn to relate to women from your authentic emotional and sexual essence, showing up for them with integrity, presence and love. And by practicing the skills of Authentic Relating you will also transform all the other relationships in your life.

Do men drive you crazy?

Women: What if you could:

  • Demystify men and understand why they react the way they do
  • Be loved for who you are and experience genuine connection with the man you choose
  • Have a romantic relationship that excites your body, stimulates your mind, touches your heart and nourishes your soul
  • Express how you feel in a way that disarms his defenses and enhances the loving
  • Communicate with a man in a way that helps him understand you and inspires him to stand by you and support your dreams
  • Turn up the heat on what you are longing for in sexual and emotional intimacy
  • Learn the incredible power of your desire and your vulnerability, and of how men love and get turned-on by expressive and authentic women — regardless of how they look
  • Clear away self-worth and sexual shame issues

Women: Are you ready to say goodbye to the endless stream of dead-end relationships, and to stop attracting  partners who need saving or fixing?  Are you willing to take a hard look at yourself and your patterns, all within a deeply supportive community of women and men?

If so, read on.

Curriculum for the Course

The best way to get a sense of the course curriculum is to attend a Free Introduction.  However, here is a brief summary of the course curriculum.

The curriculum comes in 3 parts: Authentic Relating, Sexual Polarity, and Dating Strategy.

Authentic Relating

Authentic Relating is an emerging trend in interpersonal effectiveness. It involves being emotionally aware and fully present in every situation that life presents. Authentic Relating skills are used for deep listening, clearing misunderstandings and resolving conflict in elegant and unexpected ways. Authentic Relating is extremely effective in all human relationships, but is especially effective (even essential) in dating and romance.

Authentic Relating forms the foundation for the practice of Circling, which is becoming increasingly popular all over the world. Circling is a mindfulness and communication practice. Essentially, it is listening and speaking from the heart, using “I” language to describe truthfully what we experience in each moment. It clears past baggage and improves the quality of connection with others, while opening us up to deep listening of another’s experience. Circling has the capacity to get us into spaces of deep-connection quickly, delivering rapid transformation and the sense of being heard and understood.

Read more about Circling in Marco’s free book.

Sexual Polarity

Let’s face it: men and women are different.  These differences are particularly amplified in terms of sexual needs.  To approach a sexual or romantic relationship with the idea that your partner is going to think and feel the way you do, is a recipe for disaster. And yet, that is what most men and women do.

The idea of Sexual Polarity was brought center-stage by the work of David Deida. But many other people have written about it and taught it, beginning with Rebekah and Marco’s mentor, whose name was Victor Baranco.

This is too complex a topic to get into here (and also controversial).  If you are a man, a good place to start is Marco’s book As Lovers Do: Sexual and Romantic Partnership as a Path of Transformation, and Robert Kandell’s new book UnHidden: A Book for Men and Those Confused by Them. If you are a woman, you may want to check the work of Alison Armstrong.  However, the best way to learn this highly complex (and potentially triggering!) topic is in a group of your peers, with the assistance of a skilled mentor.

Dating Strategy

Authentic Dating and Sexual Communication on Udemy

Here is another sad truth of the dating world: most men and women approach it in entirely the wrong way and from a place of ignorance.  They miss the incredible potential provided by online dating sites and apps, to meet compatible, loving, and sexy partners — whether your desire be for long-term relationship or even marriage, or simply to have more fun, stronger community, and deeper sensual connections in your life.

How is it that everyone has it so wrong? Well, first off, most people are ignorant of Authentic Relating and Sexual Polarity.  Without those two, you are programmed to fail. You will be walking a tight-rope, at best.

Aside from that, there is a lot of dating advice out there, and much of it is just wrong.  It doesn’t apply in a situation of men and women hungering, and in some cases starving, for authentic connection.

One of the main strategies that we teach is short video-dates.  While this may be a challenge for some, we strongly encourage you to at least try it out.  To start a relationship with a short video date will avoid investing a great deal of time and energy in relationships that are not going to go anywhere, it can be very fun, and it will make your first on-the-ground date much more pleasurable and more relaxed.

We believe it is extremely important to begin a romantic relationship on the right footing, immediately.  If you don’t do this, it will be much more difficult, and maybe impossible, to set it right later. And you can also cause some damage.

Got it!  What’s next?

The Power of Community

We believe that there is absolutely no substitute, in learning how to relate better to the opposite sex, for group experiences — particularly within same-sex, honest and heartfelt and “gritty” interactions with men and women who are committed to showing up for each other in love, truth, and service.  This is why we begin our courses with a 3-week period of same-sex groups, hosted within an Authentic Relating container.  You will likely get more than your money’s worth, from the men’s and women’s groups alone.

And after that, we get to have some fun! We go on “virtual dates” with men and women who have been trained to have our backs and to show up for us.

Note: since students in our courses may be signing in from anywhere in the world, the courses are not designed to lead to real dating. This is an advantage in a way, because you may be less nervous and more authentic with a person which you are not necessarily interested in, or who is “geographically undesirable”.  The point here, is that you will get to practice with a wide-range of people.  You will learn skills that could make your next date a complete home-run.

Are you in?

Then sign-up below to be notified of our next  Free Introduction.  You may also write to any of us  for a one-on-one coaching session

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Authentic Relating and Dating: Why?

In this video, excerpted from a recent Introduction to Authentic Dating, Marco and Rebekah speak about this powerful practice as it applies to dating and sexuality.

More videos here

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